Saturday, November 19, 2005

Attraction...part II

So here's a few more thoughts on my last post on attraction. I was thinking about another quote today (what a surprise) and I thought about how closely it relates to the earlier post. The quote is "If you're doing what you've always done, then you'll get what you've always gotten." So as I thought about all of the people who "look for love in all the wrong places," I thought about how to further guide these wayward hearts to true and lasting love. Sometimes we have to break out of our comfort zones and try something a little different. I can't help but think of the Seinfeld episode where George does the exact opposite of what he would normally do for an entire day. The results will probably surprise you. There's so much to do in this world. Our day to day lives have a tendency to grind us down and whisper in our ears that this is the way things are. Well sometimes you have to shout back at life and say NO! Things are the way I say they are. If you don't like the way things are...change them. If there are things about you you'd like to change and can, then change them. If you can't...Oh well, it's part of what makes you you. The trick is being able to tell the difference between the things you can and can't change. You can change more than you think. How does this relate to relating you may ask? (If you didn't, I took the liberty)

My point is is that when you try to do things to attract the opposite sex you'll usually be spending time and energy that might be better spent truly bettering yourself. When I picture meeting a soulmate, I don't fantasize about meeting her at a singles bar as our beer goggled eyes vacantly behold the potential "Mr/Ms Right Now" and try to squeeze each other into our mold of what we find attractive. Now don't get me wrong. I love going to the bar or club just as much as the next weary warrior poet, and I have heard stories of people finding true love that way. But my guess is that they are few and far between. And to relate to the previous post, you have to ask yourself what you're really after. If you have a weak spot for the "bad boy" don't be surprised when he lives up to his reputation. When I think of meeting a soulmate, I think of standing in line for coffee and the bright and vibrant woman in front of me orders the same drink as me and I'm forced to say something about it to her. Or I'm at the Library studying some piece of arcane knowledge that has recently fired my imagination when her and I reach for the same book. Pretty idealistic I know, but my point is that if you're stuck in a "loveless" love life sometimes you have to change what you're doing if you want to see different results.

So to those of you who have work to do: May you have the courage to face your fears and obstacles head on and be victorious. To those of you who have this pretty well down by now I applaud you. Your confidence and poise, kindness and gentleness, and tears and laughter will all be rewarded shortly. After you exercise one last virtue...Patience.

5 Comments:

Blogger Vixen said...

Yeah...the Patience part, that's actually one of the hardest things. Love this post btw.

6:34 PM  
Blogger Dan-E said...

great post. i agree completely. i've been trying to write about this on my own blog but you did it a lot better than i could have. great job.

4:13 PM  
Blogger fjl said...

So you think I'll be rewarded..?
:-) What a lovely Irish melody. You are one Irish rover!
I think you've done a lovely overview on this.
I so agree, don't let old self perpetuating circumstances sit like toads on your life and 'repeat croak' about how things will forever be the same. I poke that toad in the eye every day! Doing the opposite of what you would have done...there's a good theory, and sometimes I'm doing that, though I've long told myself 'it's just lateral thinking', which I was taught. But do I have the guts to do it for a day? Out of my my life's patterns and sadnesses I've developed good strategies, do I dare abandon them?
On my Posts/Articles on Baggage Reclaim, I'm always saying do what you love, and people/guys will come to you. And doing what you love has got to involve bettering yourself or it wouldn't be worth doing.
Feel free to come natter on my blog, I study secret history that at times relates to 19th century injustices towards Irish people ( and their poets:-) ), which may interest you. The secret history behind the present day.

1:19 PM  
Blogger fjl said...

I came back today to se that lovely last paragraph. Make sure you store these articles. I could see them appearing in a collection. You're a writer justifying the phrase, 'we read to know we're not alone'.
You're a blessing!

3:55 PM  
Blogger Lindsay said...

weird you and I are always such the sucker for love soo glad we both found the REAL thing!!!!! EH;-)

11:57 PM  

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