Hate the Quiz Not the Quizzer
In an attempt to silence my critics and not let my writings become too heavy handed I have decided to post this entry which originally was one of those uninspired quizes that I hate so much. But people seemed to enjoy it so I offer it for you here for your viewing anguish. Enjoy.
1. Have you ever been searched or stopped by the police?
-Yes, and thank God they didn't find it.
2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters?
-No. How would I aim?
3. When's the last time you've been sleigh riding?
-Assuming that's not a sexual euphemism, never.
4. Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone?
-Someone else is always better, I only have two hands!
5. Do you believe in Ghosts?
-Yes, but I just hope they believe in me.
6. Do you consider yourself creative?
-You tell me. Disney just bought the rights to my 'creative juices.' At least she said she was from Disney.
7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife?
-That depends. Is the pope catholic?
8. Jennifer Anniston or Angelina Jolie?
-Whoever even asked this question should be shot, burned, and have their ashes put in a vial that Angelina can wear around her neck.
9. Can you honestly say you know ANYTHING about politics?
-Well, technically I can say anything I want but thanks to the Patriot Act it's probably best to keep quiet.
10. Do you know how to play poker?
-I'm awesome. (Just don't ask my wallet the same question)
11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
-Yeah, I call it: 'The Weekend'
12. Do you kill bugs that are in the house?
-Not unless they drink all the milk and put the empty container back in the fridge.
13. Have you ever cheated on a test?
-I'm cheating on this one right now.
14. If you're driving in the middle of the night, and no one is around you, do you run the red light?
-No, and if anyone answered yes to this all I ask is that you email me with your nighttime driving schedule. Thank you.
15. Do you have a secret that no one knows but you?
-Well if I told you it wouldn't be a secret now would it?
16. Arsenal or Chelsea?
-If I knew what the hell that meant I might answer.
17. Have you ever Ice Skated?
-Not since my mom cooly informed me that I was on thin ice.
18. How often do you remember your dreams?
-I prefer to do my dreaming while I'm awake.
19. When was the last time you laughed so hard you were crying?
-The last time I showed my...wait, oh when I laughed? Oh, nevermind.
20. Can you name 5 songs by The Beatles?
-Yes. (good thing you didn't ask me to prove it)
21. Are you gay?
-Why? Interested?
22. Do you believe in love at first sight?
-I'll let you know when Jennifer Love Hewitt walks through my bedroom door.
24. Do you always wear your seat belt?
-Always. I'm too afraid that everyone else drives like me!
25. What talent do you wish you had?
-The ability to ask trite and mildly probing questions.
26. Do you like Sushi?
-Hell yeah. I even name each bite 'Nemo.'
27. Have you ever narrowly avoided a fatal accident?
-Yes. See question 24.
28. What do you wear to bed?
-I try to stick with blondes but I'm open to brunettes and redheads too.
29. Have you ever been caught stealing?
-Caught? No.
30. Does size matter?
-Not if you don't mind walking funny for awhile.
31. Do you truly hate anyone?
-Just people who write quiz questions.
32. Rock and Roll or Rap?
-Rock and Roll. Only because I can't afford the bling.
33. If you could sleep with one famous person, who would it be?
-Helen of Troy. Although her bedroom skills are probably a bit rusty by now.
34. Do you have a relative in prison?
-No. (Thank God you didn't ask if any of my relatives deserve to be in prison)
35. Have you ever sang in front of the mirror like your favorite singer?
-Yes. And I still can't figure out where the booing was coming from.
36. Do you know how to play chess?
-Very well. I just can't figure out how to get past gumdrop mountain.
37. What food do you find disgusting?
-Anything that we might otherwise keep as a family pet. Note to self: cancel vacation to China.
38. Have you ever played, "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours?"
-Yes. But I'm sure the game is much more fun if we're both talking about our naughty bits.
39. Have you ever made fun of your friends behind their back?
-Of course not. But did you hear about.....
40. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
-Yes. And then they told me they'd like to keep it that way.
41. Have you ever been punched in the face?
-This gorgeous face? Never. Well once... Okay maybe twice... Every day. *sniff*
42. When is the last time you threw up from drinking too much?
-It's been a little while. But rest assured I passed 5th grade the second time around.
43. Have you ever walked out on a movie at the theater?
-Only if I didn't pay for it. Otherwise I just burn the theater down.
1. Have you ever been searched or stopped by the police?
-Yes, and thank God they didn't find it.
2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters?
-No. How would I aim?
3. When's the last time you've been sleigh riding?
-Assuming that's not a sexual euphemism, never.
4. Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone?
-Someone else is always better, I only have two hands!
5. Do you believe in Ghosts?
-Yes, but I just hope they believe in me.
6. Do you consider yourself creative?
-You tell me. Disney just bought the rights to my 'creative juices.' At least she said she was from Disney.
7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife?
-That depends. Is the pope catholic?
8. Jennifer Anniston or Angelina Jolie?
-Whoever even asked this question should be shot, burned, and have their ashes put in a vial that Angelina can wear around her neck.
9. Can you honestly say you know ANYTHING about politics?
-Well, technically I can say anything I want but thanks to the Patriot Act it's probably best to keep quiet.
10. Do you know how to play poker?
-I'm awesome. (Just don't ask my wallet the same question)
11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
-Yeah, I call it: 'The Weekend'
12. Do you kill bugs that are in the house?
-Not unless they drink all the milk and put the empty container back in the fridge.
13. Have you ever cheated on a test?
-I'm cheating on this one right now.
14. If you're driving in the middle of the night, and no one is around you, do you run the red light?
-No, and if anyone answered yes to this all I ask is that you email me with your nighttime driving schedule. Thank you.
15. Do you have a secret that no one knows but you?
-Well if I told you it wouldn't be a secret now would it?
16. Arsenal or Chelsea?
-If I knew what the hell that meant I might answer.
17. Have you ever Ice Skated?
-Not since my mom cooly informed me that I was on thin ice.
18. How often do you remember your dreams?
-I prefer to do my dreaming while I'm awake.
19. When was the last time you laughed so hard you were crying?
-The last time I showed my...wait, oh when I laughed? Oh, nevermind.
20. Can you name 5 songs by The Beatles?
-Yes. (good thing you didn't ask me to prove it)
21. Are you gay?
-Why? Interested?
22. Do you believe in love at first sight?
-I'll let you know when Jennifer Love Hewitt walks through my bedroom door.
24. Do you always wear your seat belt?
-Always. I'm too afraid that everyone else drives like me!
25. What talent do you wish you had?
-The ability to ask trite and mildly probing questions.
26. Do you like Sushi?
-Hell yeah. I even name each bite 'Nemo.'
27. Have you ever narrowly avoided a fatal accident?
-Yes. See question 24.
28. What do you wear to bed?
-I try to stick with blondes but I'm open to brunettes and redheads too.
29. Have you ever been caught stealing?
-Caught? No.
30. Does size matter?
-Not if you don't mind walking funny for awhile.
31. Do you truly hate anyone?
-Just people who write quiz questions.
32. Rock and Roll or Rap?
-Rock and Roll. Only because I can't afford the bling.
33. If you could sleep with one famous person, who would it be?
-Helen of Troy. Although her bedroom skills are probably a bit rusty by now.
34. Do you have a relative in prison?
-No. (Thank God you didn't ask if any of my relatives deserve to be in prison)
35. Have you ever sang in front of the mirror like your favorite singer?
-Yes. And I still can't figure out where the booing was coming from.
36. Do you know how to play chess?
-Very well. I just can't figure out how to get past gumdrop mountain.
37. What food do you find disgusting?
-Anything that we might otherwise keep as a family pet. Note to self: cancel vacation to China.
38. Have you ever played, "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours?"
-Yes. But I'm sure the game is much more fun if we're both talking about our naughty bits.
39. Have you ever made fun of your friends behind their back?
-Of course not. But did you hear about.....
40. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
-Yes. And then they told me they'd like to keep it that way.
41. Have you ever been punched in the face?
-This gorgeous face? Never. Well once... Okay maybe twice... Every day. *sniff*
42. When is the last time you threw up from drinking too much?
-It's been a little while. But rest assured I passed 5th grade the second time around.
43. Have you ever walked out on a movie at the theater?
-Only if I didn't pay for it. Otherwise I just burn the theater down.
posted by Jason at 5:03 PM
1 Comments:
I like the one about the booing. Smiled broadly. I used to feel that way everytime I put pen to paper, when I was 22/3, but you kind of grow into confidence, and don't hear the boos anymore. They may stil be there but you so don't give a ----! In a way I wish for those days back again though. The extrordinary newness of everything.. and your unique subjective experience, whether people were booing, or not.
Nice about the stepping stone. Keep going x you obviously know the river to cross, that's the main thing. So many get lost, or drown.
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